Like Powdered Donuts
for Breakfast
Review by
Toryn Farr
Lately it seems Star Wars books keep popping up all over the place -- literally. Some have music, some have toys attached, some are odd sizes, and others are just plain weird. Be warned -- many of them are nowhere near worth the price.
Kiddie Books: A Guilty Pleasure
Come on, you True Fans out there. You can't tell me you haven't at least thought about buying one of those ubiquitous Star Wars kiddie books flooding the market. Heck, I bet a lot of you are secret collectors with closets full of pop-up books, sticker books, and coloring books even your mother and/or spouse doesn't know about. A few pack rats probably have vintage copies of "Maverick Moon" or "The Rebellious Robot" or even (the shame!) "Ewoks Join the Fight."
Well, it's time to come out of the closet. I am old enough to have seen Star Wars in the theaters in 1977 (as a teenager, no less), and I gladly confess I buy every book with the Star Wars name on it I can find. I read 'em, too. It's a guilty pleasure, like eating those little powdered donuts for breakfast . . . and washing them down with chocolate milk.
For those of you who look at these books and wonder if you're missing something by not reading them, let me assure you first -- you are not.
But.
But, some of them are
actually pretty good, and well worth getting for that
niece or nephew in the appropriate age range. And if
you're a sucker like me, you might want to buy two copies
and keep one for yourself -- most are pretty cheap. (Last
time I checked, all of these were still available at
Amazon.) I've reviewed below all I can get my hands on.
The best of the lot receive five "R2-D2s"; the
worst get none.
(MINI RANT: I
buy these books because I am a collector. Therefore, I
like to get first editions and keep them in mint
condition. But what did I find when I took the shrink
wrap off a couple of these books? Gouges and encrusted
stains on the covers. All I can say is, buyer beware,
even if it comes in shrink wrap. And to the excrescences
who sold me used goods passed off as mint, the Sarlacc is
too good for you, you slimy pieces of worm-ridden filth.)
GALAXY
OF FEAR by John Whitman 
#1 Eaten
Alive
#2 City
of the Dead
#3 Planet
Plague
#4 The
Nightmare Machine
#5 Ghost
of the Jedi
#6 Army
of Terror
#7 The
Brain Spiders
#8 The
Swarm
#9 Spore
#10 The
Doomsday Ship
#11 Clones
#12 The
Hunger
This is my favorite series of all the kiddie books in print right now. Bantam is cashing in on the Goosebumps craze with a series of slim paperbacks for 9-12 year olds set in the Star Wars universe involving monsters, mad scientists, and other Things That Go Bump In The Night. Some of the volumes have special "collector" holograph covers.
The premise: Tash and Zak Arranda were talking via holocomm to their parents, who were on Alderaan, when the Death Star blew it (and their lives) to atoms. Now the kids travel the galaxy with their "uncle" Hoole, a shape-shifting Shi'ido who claims to be an anthropologist but has a suspicious number of Rebellion contacts. Tash, the older sister with fledgling Force abilities and a craving to find out all she can about the Jedi, and Zak, the younger brother whose curiosity keeps landing him in hot water, spend their time almost inadvertently thwarting the Empire's most sinister plots. Along the way they meet up with Luke, Han, and Leia, outsmart Grand Admiral Thrawn, and even do battle with a clone of Darth Vader. Wriggly boneworms in cemeteries and mutant, man-eating plants/bugs are just some of the scary critters these two must defeat.
These books are actually
quite well written and enjoyable, for what they are. I
haven't found any continuity errors in them, although of
course some of the plots are implausible. But my
8-year-old niece loves them. And so do I.
CHOOSE
YOUR OWN ADVENTURE by Christopher Golden
A New Hope
The Empire Strikes Back
Return
of the Jedi
Pure fun! These books contain lots and lots of scenarios not seen in the movies. You start out as Luke's best friend on Tatooine, graduate to a member of Rogue Squadron on Hoth, and serve as a Rebel Lieutenant, developing your Force powers as Luke's apprentice. Hunt Artoo with Luke and fight Tusken Raiders. Work for Wuhan at the Mos Eisley Cantina. Defy Lord Vader to his face and get sent to Kessel. You can even save Alderaan from destruction! Then, choose to train with Yoda on Dagobah or stay with the fleet. In the Emporer's throne room, will Luke turn to the Dark Side to save you? Will you fight him to the death?
I totally enjoyed these
books. Sure, you can find a few continuity errors (the
most glaring was a "bleeding" lightsaber
wound), but I still sat up way past my bedtime working
through all the various paths to glory or defeat. And the
holographic covers are neat, too.
JUNIOR JEDI KNIGHTS by
Nancy Richardson (#1-#3) and Rebecca Moesta (#4-#6)
#1 The
Golden Globe
#2 Lyric's
World
#3 Promises
#4 Anakin's
Quest
#5 Vader's
Fortress
#6 Kenobi's
Blade
The back of each of these six slender volumes proclaims, "Anakin Solo is now eleven -- and headed for the Jedi academy! The Force is very strong in him -- he can feel it. And his uncle Luke thinks it is time for him to start his training . . ."
The fun starts when Anakin befriends Tahiri, a nine-year-old girl from Tatooine who is strong in the Force, and together they go chasing after a vision they both have to find a mysterious globe and a 400-year-old Jedi master hidden in a temple on Yavin IV. There's plenty of adventure and peril in these books, and quite a few cameos by Luke and Tionne (fodder for those of us who need a constant supply of Luke "fixes"). The reviews from young people are very enthusiastic for these books.
However, compared to the Galaxy of Fear series, I thought the writing suffered from being "dumbed down" for young readers. A couple of other things bothered me. First, the stories don't really stand on their own -- at the end of #1, for instance, the only thing that is resolved is that Anakin and Tahiri are going back to try to figure out the globe. The "climax" revolves around Anakin figuring out he doesn't have to become like his namesake grandfather, who became Vader. He realizes he can make his own choices. I guess this is a minor flaw, but I felt cheated when I turned the last page and realized the main mystery of the book was left until #2.
Second, and most importantly, the cloying cuteness of the characters gagged me. Tahiri, the sidekick, is too pretty and sweet. Anakin himself does not seem very complicated. Then there's always Artoo to rescue the kiddos from danger. And the Jedi master . . . Let this description from #6 suffice : " . . . a furry white creature with long floppy ears, a fluffy tail, and large blue-green eyes . . . ."
I'd recommend this series only for elementary-school kids and people with strong stomachs.